What a way to end a vacation.

This morning, my mom and I took the kids out to the Wyoming Territorial Prison, the frontier jail that once held the likes of Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid. I volunteered there when I was in High School and it seems like we make a trip out there every time we are in town. Today was no different.

Front of the Prison

It was hot and sunny. Should have been beautiful weather for wandering around outside. Except for the fact that I got about 3 hours of sleep last night and by the time we got out the door, a massive migraine had started. I managed to snap a few pictures at the beginning of our little tour, but finally asked my mom to take me home so I could rest. I’ve spent the entire afternoon on the couch or on the bed reading and napping.

I also screwed things up with our trip North going home. I think I’ve lost a best friend out of the whole thing and the thing that sucks the most? I knew better. I played with fire and got seriously burned this time. I’ve spent most of the (night and) day in tears and praying there was a way to turn back time and fix things. Again. I will never learn, it seems. And now all the old wounds are ripped open again and it sucks.

So, since there is no reason to head North and I can’t see hopping in the car in my current state first thing in the morning, we are going to hang out here at my parents for another day. We will leave Saturday morning and hustle back the way we came, knowing we will be home early Sunday afternoon.

Hubby will take a long weekend later on this summer to go fish in Idaho and he’ll head out tomorrow morning for one last day here. He had good luck this morning, so he’s willing to skip the last part of the trip. My aunt and uncle will be out to see us in a couple of weeks, so I don’t feel bad about changing our plans on them. They will understand.

I’m getting anxious to sleep in my own bed, see my kitties and start putting my life back together. I’ve made some important decisions on this trip – like going back to school this fall to get my degree finished up. I’m putting myself back on top of the list. This trip has been a lot about facing old demons and I hadn’t realized how far I’d fallen from my dreams until I slept in my old bedroom for a week and drove around my hometown. There are memories down every street, even though everything has changed.

The thing I forgot is to put God at the forefront and let Him guide my steps. When I try to rush things and do them my way, I mess things up royally. I also know (again) that I can not rely on man to be perfect or do all the things I might like. We are all flawed beings and hopefully, with a little grace and a lot of forgiveness, I can fix things this time or at least learn to live with the results. Again.