Confession Time


Until further notice I won’t be updating here.

I can’t seem to be able to write here and not have it thrown back in my face later. I also won’t be updating my Twitter account for the same reason. I’ve tried to let it all settle down, but that’s just not going to happen right now. I’m sorry it has come to this, but I have to protect myself and the kids from any outside scrutiny.

Please feel free to leave a comment with your email, email me directly or contact me via Facebook and I can give you the address and password to my new online home when it is up and running.

Happy Monday!

I have some explaining to do, much like Lucy and Ricky from I Love Lucy. (I love when he tells Lucy she has some ‘splaining to do, but that really has no bearing on what I came to explain.)

Last Thursday, I hit my limit. I know I’ve been talking about how good things have been going, but I admit to ignoring the negative and pumping up the positive. I have learned over the years how to present the best image possible and since there was once a plan to make this blog accessible to the whole family, I started editing.

I’m sorry I did that now.

I am in Wyoming as I type this, with the kids and staying at my parent’s house. I packed up a lot of my stuff on Friday and we left on Saturday. I finally got here last night about 7:30 pm, unloaded the car and split for a couple of hours. I got home, put the kids to bed and stayed up for over an hour telling my parents that I have thought this through and I’m done.

There are a bunch of things I need to figure out now, but I’ll be in and out. Just wanted to give everyone an update.

I’ve been thinking about the cycle of things lately. The seasons flowing into each other, the sun coming up earlier and setting later, the stars marching across the night sky in perfect order. The seeds that we planted are coming up in force right now and the flowers are blooming under the bright blue sky. The summer resident birds are coming back and the symphony some mornings is almost unpleasant. There have been blackbird courtships and male quail showdowns under the feeder in the evenings.

It’s finally Spring and I’m really trying to shake off Winter.

The simple fact is I prefer to hermit my life away. I like the solitude, the quiet hours and no strict schedule. I like the freedom of not being a slave to the clock and not running hither and yon for one activity or another. I like Winter for this reason. I can say I’m snowed in and people don’t question why I’m not out with the masses. During Winter, it is completely acceptable to curl up on the couch with a quilt and a good book. (Who am I kidding? – most days it would be the laptop!)

Spring demands that I be busy. There’s things to do, places to go and people to see. I’ve got a garden to tend, cleaning to do, adventures to plan and fresh air to breathe. Don’t get me wrong now, when I’m out and about I love it. It’s the getting out the door that is the hard part. I would much rather be home, watching my own flowers grow and laughing at the birds in the backyard.

And while I’m doing that, you can put money that I have my knitting close by. It allows me to keep my hands busy and at the same time, hang out with the rest of the family. In the last month, I finished T-Man’s hat and he loves it. I liked this pattern and it really knit up quickly.

Camo Eyes

I also started and finished a shawl, from the yarn that refused to become a hat. I would have made it bigger, but I was getting tired of working on it and wanted to use it already.

Simple Cotton Shawl Closer View

I’m onto the second sock of a pair, that has been hanging out waiting for me to get excited about it again, and then I’m going to start my first sweater.

I’m still working out how to take my knitting camping with me and keep it clean.

I’m sick.

I hate being sick. The first three days were flu-like and I didn’t eat much. Two days ago, this nasty virus settled into my sinuses and chest and is currently having a huge party. I let myself get dehydrated and I’m paying for that today in the form of the beginnings of a UTI. As if I needed something else to make me feel miserable.

I forced as much fluid as I could this morning and I’m starting to feel better. I made a run up to the grocery store for donuts and cranberry juice, which I will drink in moderation now that I’m not in pain. I’m hoping my tried and proven self-treatment will work, as I really don’t have the energy to drive up to the after-hours clinic for a prescription.

Anyway, I’m curled up on the couch today under a fuzzy blanket and with my laptop, cranberry juice in easy reach. I’m tracking mushers on the Iditarod website and logging my favorites on my log sheets every half-hour or so. I have the start of another hat on the needles right beside me and several hours of audiobook to listen to while I knit, should I get the urge. I also have the movie Australia to watch. I want to sort through all my pictures again, so I can order prints, but I can’t seem to focus long enough right now.

I’m just thankful the kids are able to fend for themselves for a bit at this age.

Hi there! Remember me? I’m sure you do, since February is shorter than every other month and in Other Month Days, at worst it is only March 1st. That’s my story anyway.

It’s been a busier-than-normal week around here because I’m trying to get ready to leave for 5 whole days. This is a first for our family and I’m so excited! I have been to town more in the last two weeks than in the last 6 months combined, with multiple dentist appointments, grocery/trip shopping and scouring clearance racks for good deals. Topping the list was my dire need of a haircut and so I set out to find a salon with an open appointment. The last time I got a Haircut went well and I had high hopes for a repeat.

This is what I ended up with, after some new layers and a thorough straightening. I am finally happy with the length, but needed some sort of shape. My stylist listened to what I wanted and was realistic about the time I want to spend on my hair in the morning. I rarely straighten my hair myself because it takes forever and my arms ache. It took the stylist about 25 minutes, even with all her tools and tricks. I really liked how it turned out and the best part of the day was that Hubby noticed right away and complimented me several time before bed! Such a change from last time!

Haircut Straight

Haircut Back Straight

I worked in a little stop at the yarn store that day too, since the salon was just two doors down. I picked out some bright yellow for something springy, a skein each of Packers yellow and green and a ball of a cotton blend for a hat I’m making for a friend, in trade for some stitch markers she’s making for me. The kids each picked out a ball of yarn (orange and purple) and I was feeling pretty good until the clerk was rude to G-Bunny. Downright rude and I doubt I will be going back to that shop. Crazy!

We have had rain overnight and in the mornings, warming up in the afternoons with clear blue skies and temperatures in the 60’s. I’ve been starting school first thing in the morning and pushing to be done by lunch, while doing laundry, cleaning and getting ready to leave town as the kids work. The kids have been spending more time playing outside and I’ve been trying to catch little snippets here and there in the middle of all the rushing.

Like this shot of my darling daughter, newly nine, but still wearing the wings without shame.

Angel Wings

Or acting like a lunatic that escaped from the looney bin.

Silly Ride-By

Or when I tell my son to “give me a serious Jedi-look” and get this.

Jedi Look

This one was, “Show me the scene with Count Dooku!”

Like Count Dooku

That, of course, led to other things.

Scene One

Scene Two

Scene Three

End Scene

And the last thing I saw before I died an untimely death.

The Last Thing

I’m not sure if I’m in love with the new template, but it definitely matches the gray mood and weather around here lately. We have been stuck close to home for so long, that Hubby told me last night he needed to take me out. I’m really starting to feel the effects of our isolation.

We are spending yet another Sunday at home because the flooding between us and the church was pretty severe. We didn’t want to risk a vehicle until we know the road has been inspected and is okay. It will be at least another week until it dries out enough to tell for sure. Just going to the library this week was an adventure. The parking lot there was overflowing because of a backed up storm drain and full drainage pond. The water was flowing out of the entrance and I didn’t realize how deep it was until I was half a wheel into it. Going home I made the big water splashes in the gutter puddles – something the kids think is really cool and it’s as close to off-roading as I can get.

I’m still slowly working on all of the “organization” projects I have on my plate. I have most of the craft stuff sorted, but don’t know what to do with all of the oversized art projects the kids brought home from school. I have a couple boxes of things that need to get put into scrapbooks, but I’m not motivated to work on them right now. I have tons of papers that need to be sorted and then shredded, which is on the schedule for today.

So far, with this new system, I have found that the kids want access to all of the craft stuff, but I have most of it put up in the bins and it’s impossible for them to get things themselves. Even my homeschool supplies have a bin. I feel like all my things have been put in little tiny prisons right now. I’m reluctant to get anything out, as to keep the mess from getting any bigger. I can’t justify doing anything crafty in there until it’s all cleaned up.

I cannot do it all. There is absolutely no way to get everything done in one day that I think should get accomplished. Most of the time, I settle for mediocrity and go for the peaceful, fun route. When I have a deadline and added responsibilities, such as this reorganization or when I was working last year, I realize just how much idle time I have available everyday.

The thing is? I like that idle time. I don’t like being stressed out and feeling rushed. I don’t like being a slave to a strict schedule. I’m never bored, partly because I fill that time with things like knitting or playing on the computer. I play board games with the kids in the afternoon or pop popcorn and declare a movie time.

I was looking at a few news articles, while preparing for a lesson on the Inauguration in a couple of weeks and I was shocked at the schedules our new First Family keeps. Both Mr. and Mrs. Obama are accomplished scholars. Both are driven and excel in their careers. Their annual income is nearly $1 million dollars. In terms of The American Dream, they have succeeded.

I wonder about the costs of that driven life. The one that got them to the top and keeps that standard maintained. I wonder how long a person can keep all the balls in the air; children, home, career, personal goals, health and relationships. I wonder what will happen under the microscope.

I also fear that a lifestyle like that will become the expectation for our country.

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